The 3-D Nudie Cuties Collection

In between the Burlesque shorts of the 1950s and the Hardcore porn of the 1970s there was a brief period of time where Nudie Cuties titillated our imaginations. Nudie Cuties followed through on the promise of the Burlesque short by actually showing us naked women, but didn't go as far having anyone have sex like what would follow in their wake. They for all practical purposes were almost innocent in their content and the way they dealt with their subject matter. Perhaps too innocent, which is why they only lasted a few short years before giving way to porn as we know it today. But in that time, a few notable people shot them, including Russ Meyer, H.G. Lewis, and Francis Ford Coppola. Naturally, 3 Nudie Cuties were shot in 3-D in between 1960 and 1962,  The good folks at the 3D Film Archive and Kino Lorber have revived two of them for modern audience perusal.

First up is The Bellboy and the Playgirls, one of two such Nudie Cuties directed by Coppola.* The producers of the film took a 1958 black and white German sex comedy called Sin Began With Eve and told Coppola to shoot some color footage to insert into the film. It was decided to do the finale in 3D, making this one of those part 3D affairs from the 60s and 70s. Most reports say that the 3D footage runs about 20 minutes. It doesn't. It's 14 minutes from beginning to end. Which means we have to endure nearly 80 minutes of some unfunny 2D material.

The film starts off promisingly with a great opening theme. Unfortunately, it's downhill from there. The plot, such as it is, is two-fold. The German footage concerns the trials and tribulations of a theatrical troupe. The director is trying to convince his prudish leading lady (future Bond girl Karin Dor) to do a sex scene on stage by telling her tales of sex through the ages. How exactly that was supposed to convince her, I'm not sure. The color footage concerns George (Don Kenney), the titular bellboy of the Happy Holiday Hotel, who wants to be the House Detective and be popular with women. George is determined to find out what goes on in Room 229 of the hotel, where there are a bunch of naked women, one of them named Madame Wimpepoole  (Playboy bunny June Wilkinson, here credited as June Wilkenson). George assumes she's that type of Madame and all the other girls are Ladies of Ill Refute as Archie Bunker would say. Naturally, the ladies are all lingerie sales models, but George is too stupid to know that. The two plots hang together by way of George, who sneaks over to the theater to observe the director and learn about women then run back to the hotel and screw up.

The problems with this movie are many. It has been accused of being a bait and switch, and not incorrectly. Much of the footage is taken up by George, a character so annoying he makes Jar Jar Binks look like Jonathan Winters. Don Kenney sorta kinda tries as George but his material is hopelessly unfunny. I'm not even convinced it was funny in 1962. Since so much is sucked up by George, there's not a lot of time devoted to exactly why an audience would be watching something like this: the naked women. To make matters worse, the two most high profile women in the thing--Dor and Wilkinson--never even take off their clothes. Dor I can almost forgive given the nature of her character but Coppola blowing getting Wilkinson naked makes me want to smack the man. Wilkinson is frankly the best looking woman in the film. She's also just about the main reason to watch. When the 3D finally shows up, the depth is fairly good and the movie almost lives up to it's potential with a 3 minute segment of just the topless women. Then they bring George back onscreen. Bleh. It doesn't help that some of the 3D footage looks out of focus, no doubt due to either the fact that it was shot on 16mm or it really was out of focus (or both). Watching this, it's hard to believe that a decade later Coppola would go on to direct The Godfather.

Fortunately, there's a second feature to be watched and is it ever a hoot. I won't go so far as to call Adam and Six Eves a good movie, but for this type of movie it's a bona-fide classic. Shot in 1960 using the old NaturalVision rig--previously used on such classics as House of Wax, Bwana Devil, Gog, and Charge at Feather River--Adam and Six Eves was only released flat in 1962. The 3D Nudie Cuties Collection Blu Ray is it's 3D debut. Watching it, I can definitively say 1960s audiences missed out big time.

The movie concerns a fat guy in a Hawaiian shirt prospecting for gold with his wisecracking mule in the desert. He comes across an oasis of beautiful naked women, who do everything under the sun to distract him from his search. He's clueless however, just looking at them with a dopey grin and wondering why they have no clothes on before continuing his search. The donkey comments on everything (no, you didn't misread that). That's literally the plot of the whole thing. But it doesn't matter. If Bellboy and the Playgirls was a bait and switch, this was a bang for the buck if ever there was one. The director wisely focuses his camera on the women, knowing that's what his audience is here for. And my God are the women in this one gorgeous. There's literally someone here for anyone's taste. The prospector's cluelessness is nowhere near as annoying as George and the donkey, while not exactly Triumph the Insult Dog, is actually funny from time to time. Best of all, the movie only runs an hour, so it doesn't overstay it's welcome. To top things off, the 3D in this is spectacular. I mean, it should be considering the camera that was used. But it really looks great. Nice levels of depth and some fun pop outs.

A pair of shorts are also included on the disc, a 1953 Burlesque short called Love For Sale and a study of 3-D Kodachrome nudes from 1951. Both are impressive. It should be noted that Love For Sale was previously available in a cut down anaglyphic version from Something Weird. Seeing it here is a real revelation.

As usual, the 3D Film Archive did a bang up job. The restoration on Adam and Six Eves is perfect. The movie looks like it was made yesterday. Bellboy and the Playgirls doesn't look as good, but they worked with what they had and some of it was never going to look perfect. As a curio and a peek into a time that no longer exists, this is a disc worth getting. Indeed, Adam and Six Eves is worth the price of admission alone. I wish I could say better things about Bellboy and the Playgirls, but that's not the Archive's fault. This disc is literally a case of taking the good with the bad. Fortunately, the good outweighs the bad.

*Coppola's other Nudie Cutie was the 2D release Tonight For Sure. As that film also has Don Kenney in it, this particular reviewer has absolutely no curiosity about watching it. One Don Kenney movie is one too many.